poems

02 December 2013

12-2-13

D'Amico adds, "Callas's 'faults' were in the voice and not in the singer; they are, so to speak, faults of departure but not of arrival.
Callas was quoted as saying that comparing her with Tebaldi was like "comparing Champagne with Cognac."

01 December 2013

#30: Choke

Went to work at seven and almost forgot my dream wherein you died!
It was an awful dream, I slept too hard and deep to get out fast.
From underneath an awning, a mother informed me, and I ignored her
And insubordinated, unblinking because enraged, and not until
In a wrapped couch hearing it from the right person did I go on from it.

Stores were closed for Sunday, so I walked more and more hungrily.
At work guests came and left per pleasure and asked for late check outs
And extra Keurig pods (:a way of institutionalizing a social expectation).

The dream lingered two hours and nourished no background.

18 November 2013

What, baby?

Nothing.
Just Looking.
Your mouth's a bad heart.

16 November 2013

#29: Candy Poem

"Sweets" redirects here. For other uses, see "Sweets (disambiguation)."
"Sweetmeat" redirects here. For the racehorse, see "Sweetmeat (horse)."
Not to be confused with Sweetbread.

Confectionery refers to the art of creating sugar based dessert forms,
or subtleties. From Old French... origin Latin... con-ficere, "to put together."
List of Western types includes caramels, chocolate, hard candies, licorice,
lollipops (named after inventor's favorite race horse), penny candy, and sours.

Divinity, fudge, marshmallow, marzipan, and taffy are examples of others.
Red Vines, Black Licorice, and Stupid Whips were forms of old-world licorice.
Also brittle and black strap molasses and Abba-Zaba bars, which can be found
exclusively west of the Rockies, almost.

Last point: United States military chocolate, half morale, half energy.
Troops called the D ration "Hitler's Secret Weapon" for its effects
on soldiers' intestinal tracts. Hershey slightly improved these with artificial vanilla.

#28: Brooklyn Bridges

The day I walked from Bath Beach to the Verrazano-Narrows
Bridge was very hot. I was with a college friend.
He was newly enrolled in a second year of more schooling,
and gave me his opinions. We passed runners and young boys
in Hasidic dress and old women in rough neutral fabrics,
looking like wood and sand lodged among the endless steel curve.
(Our path there was a stone back inlaid with a train-rail spine.)
It was the first week of September, where there'd been several
important birthdays to remind of and to admire. One's
a body I love whose masseter twitches. He is lean like a model,
aggressively focused, milky. I buy him halvah embedded
with pistachio at the shop where I pick up wine after work,
$10.99 a pound. "Halva," almost always parve in Israel,
being merely Arabic for sweet.

#27: The Verrazano-Narrows

I will wear wet hair out, and punctuate,
and scratch scalp and eventually communicate
through flight and flight's bindings.
"You're an occurrence, not mine."
"I had apologized in that." I adjust
the fake light to the frequency. I was in
the wet, remembering what other people do.
I pored over the indecision, spanning it.

Temptation above and below, verticality's amoral.
Here, nobody sent anything in flames so
between negation and particularity
the bridges won: the Golden Gate, the Bay,
the Verrazano-Narrows with its sparkling.
These hold up in photos their public snap in
hot trances, the last carries twelve lanes & crosses
the Narrows with a clearance of 228 feet
at mean high water.
There is toll westbound only.

13 November 2013

I'm also. And I can't seem to you.

what-would-i-say.com lines

Heightened sense of a good thing
Frats on game and I might be great
Was my Riviera love, peering at the old lady dropped it.
Living is asleep in DISAGREEMENT THERE. I have to say
funny stuff
And the poem the Chronic and our BART on the back to Berk
It's just a girl's body. Wednesday: April 6 home
People keep you
NOLA one and only one because she says / lying through Season One
You were just silent after he had a video I can really
awoke to this
I'm not that 'transgressive' is a genius... I would walk out on that
is a Mexican is FRENCH
And his lyrics, stating I saw Claire's. When are you
We should graduate early and I stole my mom
that's the opposite of hungry right
that's London, and i'm
That was correct.
Keith's what's on shuffle on Shattuck
Sort of a few minutes my fingers felt like
don't hurt Marilyn, to tell
glasses raised to the difference, though, really?
Strong words make things which aren't; though if
You were still breathing, next one
BUT I am incomplete. None can almost feel
I just saying
he said it
is a favorite drink of which listening is a very singular one
I just I can manage, remember to have plans
don't be a very pretty dance, said to Marcus Aurelius IT'S UP
as you had been
will memorize before it's not one
indolently. in an amazing vacation & co.
I'm also raise their hand in a good at sleeping
has a nice long talk about
And the Thames.

Wait wait, On such legs as it
I got sick, was reminded of me
as you paint it, just imagine it, three seconds before you
I have flown, I probably would walk out with a Friday.
you are perfect, you
how many times can you
Went & set in the largest ocean on a houseboat?
but. genius I'm just really
ilk ea with earl
You deserved an addendum on shuffle on the Male Gaze
You deserved an artist
I'm also taking off her Norton Anthology and the Internet, but it's very separate from an amazing vacation and Goyle. And... are?
gasps Maybe seven years of good idea
this is just too many times can you
Look at this
Formula A lady with my clothes again
All my honey and C/Lucy has her coffee simultaneously
Lethargic and a video I put together of me
i'm free in two days. maybe.
Now contemplating taking a sound for
But I have a squeeze of the Golden Gate, and Emma Watson's like
how we're going to the semester
listening to the tone of normity in the laundry room, it's pouring in need
I feel about
This is her in a hoodie and iced champagne? I can't rap about
berkeley kids whose concert is over
People keep you
all the fact that notion recently?
only yesterday, steve, did I learn the devil days of my bigger fears.
no, but he Muir wouldn't let me
Anonymous May 2 weeks, but budget cuts necessitated a girl's body. Marilyn.
My correction works, must wait a minute.
I was talking to calm down
You deserved an umbrella



"what would i say?" automatically generates Facebook posts that sound like you! Technically speaking, it trains a Markov Bot based on mixture model of bigram and unigram probabilities derived from your past post history.

12 November 2013

Nonpoem

There is nothing that wins a heart over like deification, and nothing that beats
it like that. The next move avoids the that. I self-distract.
i'm not writing today. i haven't written in a lot of days, like since coming up to berkeley, so four weeks or so. not that i wrote in san diego either, or my final semester at cal. but at least i tried? or more than recently. i don't feel like it. my neck is crunched. my hair feels bad. my lower back is going in anticipation of a few days from now. my nails are at their ragged painful lowest (esp right thumb, middles, rings. ruining left as i speak). feel crummy and shitty. pop music in this cafe. "yeah, i'm getting kinda hungry." tense and mean from papers. cold and inhuman, but humanly petty. how then is the sex so good? now contorting his fingers and staring at the ground talking to himself. nothing bothering me especially except the nail situation. hurts and is hideous. lean man, blue puffy vest, hair dyed pink, sets his backpack down and orders a sandwich. three women set up scrabble. belladonna, lady of the rocks, lady incapable of describing or making anything but recreated situations. and stale allusions, and self-hatred. and a pulsing in the right upper arm indicative of atrophying muscle. and that repronounced pain in the lower back. "i'm raising the white flag." like streamers off a wheel. "i like the idea of the moffit cubicle. but we don't have to. i'll start packing up?"

30 October 2013

Page 8 of Brooklyn College's Graduate Program Online Application

From what country or part of the world did you or your family originally come?

Page One of Online MFA Applications

Which of the following racial groups best describes you?

21 October 2013

#25: "A Tree Filled With Angels, Bright Angelic Wings Bespangling Every Bough Like Stars"

When according to Blake, "God put his head to the window."
Like his, our mothers taped our hard work to her walls.

15 October 2013

#24: Thought Toward Irreverence

The past cannot betray one.
Only revelation.
And even in those cases
it was you "all along."
Sit and look occupied;
trust the existence of the situation.
Alone, one saves the effort.
Paired, too. And in this case
one's past swivels
irrelevantly on a rod.

#23: Mobiles

I fatigue and am not on. A neighbor distracts.
Across the street two cops unload
duffels from a patrol, and a girl with a pink
birthday bag sprouting lilies wisps past, watching.
Students in sandals make little lunges, shuffle their loose feet.
With each miniscule tread they are granted
that primary satisfaction of vitiating decadence.
At least they're not going backwards or stagnant, that is.
Now there's a personal terror in their stepping.

12 October 2013

#22: Locomotion

Crocodilians have a flexible, semisprawled posture.
Chameleons are the only modern reptile with a more erect posture.
The semierect posture makes it possible for some species to gallop if necessary.
An Australian species can reach a speed of 16km/h on an irregular forest floor.
Their ancestors actually had fully erect postures, indicating the sprawling evolved
after they adapted to life as semiaquatic ambush predators.
Their ankle bones, or tarsi, are highly modified.
Modern crocodilian locomotion is not a primitive trait, but a specialization.

[http://en.wikipedia.org/wiki/Crocodilia]

#21: When Was The Last Time You Thought About Your Parents?

Granted, the note assumes love is an inevitability.
He or she begins by relating the tone of his or her current status,
or by quoting a familiar. "After I shower I'll pick you up,
carry you around, and put you back down."
The responsible citizen cites his sources, e.g.,
I was once accessory to a damaging liaison;
I marginalize and am meticulous.

I no longer blame it.

11 October 2013

???

White lighters bad luck
sat in my chamber with dull hills
of hair and no room for a companion -

the labor of hefting it unthinkable
even at the thought of princes
underfoot. How many hundreds

of pounds it must weigh how unlikely
a man with a grip as to scale it.
Safety gator-tackles blocker.


Observation practice

I need an idea before beginning, not mere observation of sense.
My toes and legs are cold; my back and shoulders are sore.
The walls here have mosaics and framed images of roses.
Amidst these hangs a shiny map of the Forbidden City.
Whorl for a combined pleasure (is there no deeper action?) like a centrifuge
(Or that is a centrifuge). Through what the article calls purpose, object
Becomes instrument. Just so is landscape displaced portraiture.

08 October 2013

#20: Dream

I am back in Brooklyn and it is July.
It is my birthday and I wake up late.
R stands over me, saying: "Put clothes on,
I'm making you breakfast"and watching
me reach for a shirt while hiding myself.
Our attitudes shift and I stop hiding
and stand fully, and turn, looking for clothes.
R gives a few sentences on cereal
and coffee, and the gift of being stared at.
He tilts the sheen from breathless to comedic
and breathless, opening a window.

07 October 2013

#19: Dream

"We stand by the window embracing, and people look up from the street:"
—Paul Celan

Conflated pleasure with lack of pleasure and correlated weakness.
Either way, begging. All Signs Point To Yes.

06 October 2013

#18: New Place

Here I am (4 days before
move-in) negotiating. Thinking,
simplest way to brighten is with flowers.
Thinking, one buys weekly or biweekly
depending on stalk woodiness, vivacity,
and they rise glorious from big glass,
solving the room's smallness.
But then, what's that, ten dollars?
How am I oriented that I already vitiate next
week's colors with "How can I
afford flowers?" Most dendrites end
with raising rationalism and putting
the rest down- you either can or
can't afford them. Despite what they do for you.

02 October 2013

#17: Kathleen

The Ob/Gyn exam rooms overlook the UCSD
baseball fields. On one wall hang screens and equipment,
on one a print of Matisse with flowers and goldfish:
soft-edged, warm, gentle, calm. Kathleen
inserts herself and feels for my cervix. "These
are your ovaries:" tug, push. "And don't they feel
perfectly normal." I explain the aversion
to hormone implants and she tells me my methods
are fine. Baseball players jog the diamond.
"You seem quite the responsible girl," she says, and is off.

#16: Poem With Rhythms

(after Wallace Stevens)

The strike extended into evening
Affecting players.

The cup holding coins takes a metal smell on,
(A girl packs knives and dishrags for their
First shared space, impatient and excitable,)
Expendable, dark in there:

So the girl folds the knives up dearly.
Separately, he makes mini moves
And goes in further, though yet waiterly.

It could be that the strike was mere
or inaudible since she strayed, wrapping their knives.
There was an aptitude in her nervy, blank holding-off,
A high-class estrangement and re-enfranchisement
Richer than buying time. This stance toward us
She gloried and didn't it do her favors,
Including opting-out of players
And clocking no-shows. She kept us
Healthily at bay, we weren't worth waiting for
Even through dark glasses inside of a car.

30 September 2013

#15: After East Bay [Poetry Summit]

"Better to do neither, that's your job now" -GGO'B, "After England"

Mostly we went for the people, taking
notes on how they looked and dressed
and talked, what they chose to drink,
which mannerisms and spindly networks surfaced
as we id'ed relationships: S.D. knows J.S.
from school, J.S. knows everyone
because it is her shindig,
B.B.'s a space cadet whose hand everyone grasps at.
Features of uniform helped somewhat in determining
origin (collars, severe parts, plaid buttons,
black ass-kicking boots). "The neighbors have
always across the street complained," our hostess
said, admitting that shiftiness.

Androgyny's syntax came first, gripping Pyramids.
I flattened my hair and neckline to man up.
Someone's child got the stringed toys down
from the lamp to shake repetitiveness
out of a reading. J.S. had on brown brows
and yellow hair, perched like a safari creature to watch.


29 September 2013

#14: Un/conscious dump

Sometimes I blink and look out of the screen to realize I've been clicking through nothing I care about. I then adjust my posture, lifting my spine and settling the shoulders perpendicular. I then list what I have to do, at this instant, then daily, then in the next three days, then weekly, then monthly, then next some indeterminate time ahead of now, and I visualize the day and how I will do what and how much I can do. I then shear down what from what I can/should do to what I feel like doing or to what seems possible- I can book appointments and make coffee, I can finalize a list of schools, I can memorize the first 100 words of the list of 450. By this time I am slouching again and my one shoulder juts up while the other depends, crimping my neck, inflaming my lymph nodes. All the while taking stock of surrounding noises (Barclay's Premier League on the TV, Liverpool's American forward winning the game; click-padding of dog's feet). Do things like check bank account online and email people back. Fantasize about packing boxes neatly by room, kitchenware, bedding, clothes. Make new list of things to find as cheap as possible once in the new apartment- dresser, desk, chair, kitchen table unless the one in Y's garage is located and extracted. Resist the urge to transcribe the soccer announcer. Gaze at myriad fetishes and utensils on my work desk, knowing I won't be bringing them with me (the wooden hand to draw from, the bronze elephant, reference books, childhood piggy bank of foreign change). The dog pads in and circles and exhales beside the bed. Luis Suarez finally scores.

#13: The Gaping Gulf

(title: Mark Ford)

I claim to get the epochs-old appeal
of non-raw data entry, but find
it egoistic, less noble
than laziness.
So I recorded from my car: you can only
be interested,
primary definition, once;
and gauchness, old La Jolla,
blue tile white tile pale tile, pairs of
Mexican palms and the gauchness,
sixties, fifties, Floridians coming to roost.

Next day,
accelerating in turns.

Then the ocean is exceptional today,
noon high tide, thickly
turbulent.

He rhymes baby with baby with baby with baby with baby.

27 September 2013

#12: La Jolla Pannikin Transcription II.

[2 men, one settled, other fidgeting]
[Fidgeting:] I need the ocean,
okay. I can overtrain or undertrain
or no, but when I go in and hang out
for half an hour or however long
I come back feeling like that
million dollars. And there's a feeling
I want to carry with me three, four days.
Cause overall, things are pretty good.

[Replaced by new man, settling
with documents]
[New man:] This is perfect,
no, perfect, it's what we pay
that sunshine tax for.
How's the surf?

We went and checked
at Windansea, we looked
at Horseshoe; it looked fun but
you know what? It looked like it
was coming out of north, northwest,
it had this funky lump to it.

Like the swell had taken its toll, right.

#11: La Jolla Pannikin Transcription

True story. (nodding) Women pick us,
man. (laughter)

My wife and I — met in real life.
So many of our friends do not.
We got married at Calamigos Ranch
(nodding) (pursing lips)
in Malibu.

I'll be seven years sober October first.
I freebased heroin (nodding)
never needles —

I want to have control over people
and I want to have control over my life.
I have to be reminded
on a daily basis — or I forget.

(nodding) I was with Seth in Beverly Hills,
I got him the job.
I got him two jobs (nodding).
Did you go to his wedding?

26 September 2013

If there's honest-to-God Chagalls in her house, [...]

#10: Horoscope Brooklyn

You are now playing a vital part
in an important process
but will not be lionized
when accepting the diagram
even when not drawn to scale
which weaker would in fact
lionize

I had read of you but learned
by living with you how you really
liked baseball on the radio
at night
you left it on in the room
to buzz through onto the patio

and it stayed after coming back in
and a stretch of considering
books, innings broken by a song:
"Your favorite day dream... everything
touch I turns golden for you"
mane rippling

24 September 2013

#9: Gegen Ashbery's "In A Lonely Place" (Three Poets)

External from strict
speaking ever one
defers to rounding
out an aforementioned
list: is this the new
condition of
stricture, finishing?
Lists being strict. And
vague bullets fail
to fire, by nature mild.

more Cassandra; Sinon

Honest is context. Past the talking point,
by where seers outnumbering orators paused
not to be heard, and were not heard like static,

#8: Soreness

The underarm's a dead giveaway
that there's lymph nodes involved
and yesterday's exertions laterally

exacerbated by the change in barometric pressure
paired with the shock of the anesthetic
from mouth surgery you left hanging

(the corset feeling anyway
suits to benefit one's posture, as in
ballet; "if you're not straight and tall

each push will be a hop and blow
your knee eventually. [Jangle of
piano.] Those are not real jumps.")

23 September 2013

Listening to Geoffrey's litshow (#88)

I know what I am and I know what I am doing, "desperate leisure"
allowing a speech outside the boundary: a shiftiness, active.

#7: Gorilla Coffee

Made myself eggs and half a rye bagel which is worth talking about because it happened
in SoHo (which stands for Houston) once I noted dartingly what every woman
was noting, the clothing of competitors, how denim on denim was trending
again (light tops dark bottoms, rolled sleeves, one done oversized one fitted

because this isn't the west coast and you aren't sloven that way today)
done in soft washes, cowlick cotton hung from shoulders
and dropped as a parabolic brushstroke down from collarbones
where the boatneck hem starts. Bicyclists order in tight black,

hair sleekly pulled to one side drips its line to sharp elbows,
looking on thin arms almost cocked, wearing neon shorts and Nike Airs.
Patches of sunlight twitch the hardwood counters
as a white rag polishes them, handled by a silk vest and khakis.

22 September 2013

#6: Scouts Picnic

A mother ornaments chopped watermelon with mint and lime,
restoring the pieces to its hollow rind, whose sheared rim
she has perforated in zigzag.
A sheen of Reynolds' wrap seals its face, buoyant
with kitchen daylight, motile from screened wind.

21 September 2013

#5: San Marcos House

I had them take a picture of us
kissing either side of his face.
The backyard's physical vocabulary
was crude from accidental burning.
People smoked through the patio deck
behind the driveway, whose fluid jagged tar
exhumed heat the day had siphoned into it.
Bunched palms burst the cloud cover, purply.

18 September 2013

#4: Animal Virtues

Virtue 1: lack of irony.
2: lack of self-consciousness.
3: awareness of needs.
4: compassion for body.
5: general trust— cf. 6: capacity
for steady gazes, grace, activity.

17 September 2013

#3: MFA Paragraph

Here, my application of implied interest in joining a coterie of men
who call acts on others' parts 'incredibly human.' The redundancy
in sales, in markets, of leases and loans of speech, accumulates.
Creature excoriates when left to its device.

15 September 2013

#2: Always have to water down my lemonade

Always have to water down my lemonade.

"#2"

Not in this pain I won't start the project.
Little black case, bigger silver case.

12 September 2013

#1: Template

It's good to have goals. What I am expecting to provide are references
like corners and heights of ceilings that mark the shape and range
of a feeling intensified by 476 miles, a vivid obsolete afternoon.
My face is pretty swollen and I'm on a couple kinds of painkiller.

First, the pass: before location, electricity, water, comes the pass.
Asked for information, we would-be dwellers supply strenuously,
lengthening out what were crimped mouths and hands, acknowledging
slight movements outside of birds, landscape workers, wind flights.

I have that tendency to open on statements. Inquiry is looser and
frankly rips the rug of surety out, an assertion I make based on star signs.
I can recognize the kind of lines I'm making as typical of my style (a number,
an adjective that came around from being overused to un-, a grasp at the casual,

some more personal comment with no designs,
tricolon, a general anxiety about parts not hanging together, the impulse
toward staccato to close and a shorter stanza, astrology reference,
repeating a word without realizing, feeling worse if achieving what was set out
having been taught to disdain and set beneath what seems like "progress."

"#1"

Reinitiation of the poem-a-day series beginning today (tomorrow?)

02 June 2013

tonight i saw a play, faeries and kings, and thought about you in the acts where the young were kept apart. nobody controlled their directions or their selves-and-others. consider the arrangement to see each other again in the beginning of the week, what tactile fragrance it like the head of the new cat has (she smells young and milky), how it has the mute insistence that burst pipes the first instance of our.

02 April 2013

Theft

On a pool theater edge
kiss the fly that swims and leaps,
crawls and limps, drinks lies eats and dies
whose zigzag drawing bids eat

Above water
where woman's dipped neck strains
tremulous swallows

Doing something for ten years is real
nothing to helping and watching for that long
Law that you mistake or that
transforms

14 January 2013

Calendar notes 2012

You'd be here right now. You'd be here
all the time. You're lots of people. You'd all
get along...
tobacco lavender laughing dust spearmint
Apophenia: seeing patterns where none are
slowly gently smoothly kept capped.
Don't let pressure cloud your clarity there are
definitely answers but you may have
to give a little ground Clement is 24 everyone
you will ever meet knows something
you don't return rented books