08 April 2014

#11: Del Mar Country Club

He wanted swans for the pond and proposed it to the owner, and he loved it so they bought these really expensive swans and the coyotes got them. And your father was so devastated. How could he have known? But he said he should have known.

05 April 2014

#10: Notes (to add to)

(Balling and unfurling into/out of a fist)
Can you imagine the heart of a snake or an iguana - ? - just, small?
"Lust overrides disgust at all times, until it doesn't" (Anne Tardos).
the gold hair working down the back
it's hot. he uses his hands (for his work, paring lemon).

#9: Cloister

I mean I followed all the rules but it didn't come out realistic.
"South Netherlandish," as a student says.
I am not a student anyway (I am between institutions
which feels like avoiding the term unemployed
hence volunteering interstice and delaying choosing).

I bite myself, not futile, the way addition is not math.
As I drew it, I believed I would not be able to tell after
I'd depicted a napkin; revisiting it is almost obvious
and clear from four soft straight lines. The other objects
are easy: iced tea glass, furniture, body from an angle.

I mean by "full" creating states with no reserve.
I started a month ago: "And if the beloved's heartbeat is irregularly
quick, what liability benefits are you eligible for?
Nicole can catch
on to the joke of my jewelry,
that is the dragonfly stud, we are more and better
than ironic when we get going -
"I don't care if I ever come back." So it's twilight
of your assumptions about the free spirit
I do not have"

A modicum of salt ripples the table,
visible to the hand every afternoon.
Wool warp with wool, silk, silver, and gilt wefts,
gift of Mr. Rockefeller to the museum, hangs.

01 April 2014

#8: Recipe Website

Not a single post in March:
I got rejected from four schools, into two, and waitlisted by one.
Haven't really been trying since.
Checked out Muse & Drudge on a whim.
Threw dust at a window (submitted).
Bought a macaroon and saved it for eight hours in wax paper.
Made tea three times in one day.
Tried at-home yoga.
Got blasted by a thunderstorm.
Had an earhole nearly close due to bad jewelry.
Have more than half a pint of liquid egg whites in the fridge that I won't / don't know how to put to use,
except by recreating the partial failure that was Nicole's Jack Roses after dinner last weekend.
The eyes close so happily.
I had a line--fuck-- what want what everyone would want or
(Ella - Just A-Sittin and A-Rockin)
Can you substitute real egg whites for liquid to make macaroons with?
I looked up ten recipes for macaroons.
I can content myself—and that's not the worst part, but it's getting there.
With nothing formal, taking no class the suddenly
wanting to eat macaroons until my carotid bursts.
My friend locks himself in the bathroom and thinks about his paper.
I don't know where within ten minutes' walking I'd buy shredded coconut so this was a waste of time anyways."In a very large skillet, heat half the oil til shimmering."
I'm done with the digestible self-eating.
Would recreate the drinks soon but doubtful I'll get my friend to join me.
What bears repeating? "You're going to need a failing"
I get it now, he was rehearsing his professor or one of his professor's friends.
"Serve right away with lemon wedges and additional cheese." This recipe website sure
knows how to take the sumptuousness out of instructions.
"In a processor, pulse the tomatoes, almonds, and garlic." "Sprinkle until the sauce